Guilt is in every step. The man of sin steps into the hearts of the pure for refuge. Out of place he feels, with his reeking soul. He is only half there. Empty eyes and a resonating laugh. His heart weighed down with infinite questions, his essence blown away with broken hopes and shattered dreams. Where does he belong!? Who will let him into their existence? Attention-starved he swallows his acid salt tears. Death on his mind he prays. Abandoned by everyone and accepted not. His pain’s magnitude incomprehensible. The hated man roams the empty roads and laughs ironically at the absurdity of love; A passionless quest for self-fulfillment. “Oh Lord, why have you let me stray?” he questions the ice cold night. His heart as numb as his fingertips, his breath a struggle he’s dying to give up but yet…he can’t. The ultimate test has been thrown his way and now failure invades his dreams, turning the pleasant into a scream of the night that pierces sanity and kills the innocent. Lost. He is so lost; beyond; confused he stumbles as he runs into the middle of nowhere. He sighs as he falls eternally into delusion. What does he have to do to undo this curse? Values screech “Off with his head!” His heart alive with emotional tides, conflicted and hopeless what can this man do? “Oh Lord why have you condemned me to this fate? My love for you burns eternal… yet my faith quivers for an instant. Oh Creator; I am flawed! Fix me or forgive me!” Alone in the corner the man weeps. A broken home and a world infested with selfish savages. Discriminating lions his way daily cross. Misunderstood he closes his eyes. Why has the world not disappeared? Only death is certain, death and this incessant pain that no other can fathom. Will death bring the desired peace or will it trigger the journey that will strip the humanity out of his soul? “Oh Lord what have I done to deserve this? ‘Privileged I am’ they say. Oh Merciful it is just too hard! I want to devote myself to you but how can I slaughter my heart’s desire?” Life a wave of laughter and tears, happy but eternally sad, everlasting underlying pain. “Who is there to help me? Will I be saved? Will I survive or give into damnation as the holy time arrives and the devils’ chains rest still? Will my faith carry me through or will my soul, the mother of sin, trap me in the turmoil of an endless black and boiling night?”